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“Some things aren't meant to be broken, and therefore can't be mended - ever. I was one of those things. Whatever had been shattered in the incident would never be whole again.”
Amber struggles with the memories of a cruel attack that destroyed her life years ago. Realizing that she’s close to ending it all – something she promised her family to never try again – she moves in with her brother Brian and his friend Zachary to start a new life, and maybe even college. But how can she possibly live a normal life, when even a hug from her brother sends her into a panic attack? While Brian pulls back, Zach seems determined to make her feel relaxed in his presence, and soon her longing to be near him is stronger than her fear. But how can someone like Zach, someone who can have any girl, want someone like her? Someone broken.
When Zach spots Amber for the very first time, he can’t believe she is the same girl his friend Brian described as broken. Suddenly, Zach wants to give up his womanizing ways and help Amber live again – show her that closeness can be something wonderful.
But her brother Brian isn't the only one who’s worried about the bond that’s growing between Amber and Zach. Even Zach knows that there’s more at stake than the fury of a scorned woman. Amber isn’t like all the girls Zach discarded after a night together – if he messes up, that could break her for good. But Zach can’t stay away from Amber.
Can Zach help her heal? Or will he be the one to push her over the edge?
I wanted to kiss, Zach. Take control. I bit my lip. Taking control, was that even something I could do? Three years ago control was ripped from me and since then I’d never managed to reclaim it. Maybe Reagan was right. Maybe I needed to finally get it back. And what better way to do it than with Zach? He wouldn't hurt me.
“You have a strange look on your face,” Zach said with a grin, then became serious. “Are we okay? Did Reagan say anything about me? Anything bad?”
I laughed. “No.” I gathered my courage. “I want to kiss you.”
Zach’s eyebrows shot up. “You can kiss me whenever you want. You kissed me today.”
“I mean,” I said, my voice turning into a whisper. “I want a real kiss.” Could this get any more embarrassing?
Zach straightened, surprised. “Sure.”
“Can you sit down?” The words rushed out of me.
Confusion flickered on his face but he sank down on the chair Reagan had sat in moment before without protest. I stood and slowly walked over to him. With him sitting, I had a couple of inches on him. He tilted his head up, not making any move to reach out for me. His hands rested on his thighs. He was trying to look as harmless as a man of his size and stature possibly could. Was Reagan right? Was he as nervous about this as me? Who knew what Brian had threatened him with? I stepped between his legs and put my hands down on his shoulder. Take control.
I’d kissed two boys before the incident, but this felt new. I wasn't that girl anymore. She’d been broken, crushed, obliterated. For a long time I’d mourned her, had cried over the fact that she was lost to me forever and with her my happiness, my life, my future. Maybe what had been broken couldn't be mended, maybe I could never be the girl from the past, but I could become someone new.
Zach’s eyes searched my face. I’d thought I could never trust a man again. Take control, I reminded myself once more. It was a mere kiss, a kiss I’d been dreaming about for days now. But what if the worst happened and I had a panic attack? Would Zach decide I wasn't worth the trouble? “Tell me what you’re thinking,” Zach murmured. Something stirred in me at the worry in his tone. I wanted this. I wanted to feel Zach’s lips on mine.
I brought my face closer to his until our breath mingled. Zach’s blue eyes bored into me, soft and encouraging. Maybe my brother was right. Maybe Zach was a mistake, but he was a mistake I wanted to make. It would be my choice. I pressed my mouth against his, my eyes closing. Gathering my courage, I touched my tongue to his lips, hoping he’d understand it as permission and take lead. Zach lifted one arm and gently cupped my cheek, then he opened his mouth and his tongue slipped past my lips. He was hot and tasted so good, and every brush of his tongue against mine sent a small shiver of pleasure through my body. I could even feel it in my toes. My choice. His tongue became more demanding and heat pooled in my belly. I wasn't even sure what I was feeling, but it was so good, so freeing. I never wanted this to stop, this feeling of being in control of my body, my wants. Zach’s other hand came up to touch my back. My legs felt weak as our mouths glided over each other. I raked my fingers through Zach’s hair, and if possible the sensations cursing through my body got even more intense. I pulled back to catch my breath, my eyes fluttering open and meeting Zach’s gaze. The corners of his lips turned up and I couldn't help but smile back. “You okay?” he asked softly, lowering his hand from my cheek.
“Better than okay.” My skin was still burning but this time it wasn't only from embarrassment. I wanted to kiss him again and again.
I'm an author of erotic romance and New Adult novels. I live in one of the ugliest cities of the world with too many pets and only one husband. I'm a lover of good food, wine and books and I'm addicted to Dexter, Californication and Big Bang Theory.